Only A Tool
by Angel Fantasy
Summary: It didn't matter if he suffered the deepest agonies known to mankind; to them he was just an experiment, a 'tool' to be used as they pleased to help them win the war against the Millenuim Earl. Innocence x Kanda, when he and Alma were 10 years olds.


**Disclaimer:** I do not own D. Gray Man, no matter how I wish I could. That privilege belongs to Katsura Hoshino only.

**A/N:** A drabble I came up with as I re-read DGM's recent chapter updates. The plot bunny popped up out of nowhere, took a hold of my hands and made me type this despite the fact that I should be doing homework right now. I'm sorry in advance if the ending is complete crap.

Still, I hope you'll enjoy it. *nervous*

Oh yeah, before I forgot:

_'Italics'_ = thoughts

"Normal" = speaking

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Only A Tool

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Kanda howled in agony as his body tore itself over and over again, blood splattering everywhere as he suffered yet another rejection. He fell to the ground and stared at the ceiling with glazed eyes, his mind numb from the pain as he waited for his body to heal.

"Again, Yuu! Try again!" Sirlin's voice ordered somewhere to his right, unperturbed.

Fiery hot pain ran through his limbs as the two Crow members surveying his synchro session hauled him up by his armpits and presented him to the caged Innocence. His vocal cords were not healed yet, so he couldn't scream for them to stop and let him regenerate in peace.

Dazedly he stared at the angel-like-thing before him that has been the cause of all this suffering for the past hour. Hanging from a pillar with its head lowered, its wings hazardly fluttering as it struggled against its binds, the damned Innocence seemed to be in just as much pain as him, if not more with all those spellbinds restraining its power.

It clearly had never wanted to be in this situation, just like him. It was resisting with all its might, unwilling to submit and synchronize with him.

Weakly he extended his hand towards it as he tried to synch with it once more. The Innocence's wings pierced roughly him in response, sparks coursing through both of their limbs as it gauzed him unwillingly.

'_Why don't you stop resisting?'_

"Goddamned Innocence..." Another rejection, another moment of agony, another puddle of blood. Unfazed, the Crow members stood by as he fell to the ground in a bloodied, tangled heap.

"580 seconds until full regeneration. Once more, Yuu!"

Somewhere in the background, Lenny shouted a warning. "Professor! Alma's heart has stopped beating!"

"Don't worry. He's a second too, so he should be compatible. Restrain his Innocence's power more!" retorted the Professor.

'_Alma's... going through... this too...?_' dazedly thought the dark-haired boy as he was mercilessly hauled to his feet yet again.

"Yuu's too! Lower his Innocence's power!"

Kanda saw it trash in its bindings from the corner of his vision as its power was sucked out by a draining spell. It looked as if it wanted to scream in pain. After a minute, it slumped against the pillar, its wings hanging limply from its frame. Still, Kanda could feel defiance radiating from the being.

'_It's as unwilling as me to go through this...'_

Again he presented his hands and it presented its wings, and again the same result occurred.

"Once more! Try to connect once more to the Innocence!"

He felt it stare down at him threateningly, as if daring him to come back for another go. Again the draining spell was activated, and again it lost more of its power. The defiance didn't disappear.

He tried again, already knowing the outcome.

'_I know you don't want this, and I don't want it either. We're in the same boat for this shit, so fucking get over it already!'_

Another rejection, this time a little less painful. On the side, Sirlin voiced his excitement as the results came by and announced a higher chance of compatibility.

"Dr. Sirlin! Don't push Yuu any further! This session has already surpassed the time limit!" Lenny shouted, worried.

"But this is the first time in 90 years that the results have shown some progress! We can't stop now; we're too close to create another Exorcist!"

"Good results or not, this is enough! Let Yuu heal and rest!" Dr. Edgar butted in, furious.

"Just one more time! Only once more and we'll stop for the day!"

"No, Professor! Stop this already!!"

The rest of the argument Kanda didn't hear, because his hearing sense flickered as he was dragged up to a standing position by the ever silent Crow guards.

A bitter smile crossed his lips for a split second before his hanging head hid it from view.

'_Heh. To you all it doesn't matter whether I'm suffering or not.'_

Both the possible Host and the Innocence fragment entered the synch phase again. He stared at it, panting, tired, exhausted, trembling.

'_It must be hard... Restrained as you are, unable to let your power run wild like you've been created to.'_

The synchronization seemed to pause, as if the other was listening to what he was thinking. _'I too wish that none of this had happened. I'm an Apostle, a false one, and my path has already been pre-destined. It's been decided by others that you and I ally ourselves to become an Exorcist and save the world, whatever that means. We didn't have any say in the matter.'_

'_After all,'_ the electricity between the host and God's Crystal increased_. 'We're only tools to other people's eyes, tools they crave to possess and control to do their every little wish. Nothing more, nothing less.' _

Yet another rejection occurred. This time though it seemed that his soon-to-be-partner decided to help him put an end to his suffering; the pain that shot through his body was so intense that it fried all of his brain cells. Blackness engulfed him as what was left of him hazardly stumbled back a few steps before hitting the ground with a dull 'thud'.

"YUU!!" Dr. Edgar yelled from the sidelines, eyes wide as saucers he stared at the bloody mess that was the Second Apostle.

Scientists and doctors rapidly rushed in and took the armless, injured boy back to the infirmary. They passed the room where Sirlin was angrily scribbling down statistics and scratching off check marks, whilst muttering "Another failure, again! This specimen also is useless!". He didn't even chance a glance at the boy.

The crew carefully handled him as they neared the hospital wing, worried for his well being even though they knew that he couldn't die. But as they deposited him on the first free bed they saw, Yuu's lips shifted into a broken, bloodied smile that sent chills down their spines.

A broken smile that clearly told them how difficult it was to breath in this dark place he had awakened into as nothing more than a tool in human form, whom scientists summoned and disposed of as they pleased without an ounce of care about his feelings and health.

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**A/N:** Wow. I seriously didn't think I'd get a new fic done today at this hour. It's currently 23h45 on my side, I have college tomorrow, and I still haven't started my homework. Plus, I lost my USB key, and all the information that was stored in there (as well as all the NC-17 DGM doujinshis I had in it, dammit) was lost. I pray that whoever finds it doesn't look inside unless he or she wants to see explicit yaoi scenes.

About my other stories... 'Pleasured Into Insanity's' updates are temporally stopped, because school is dropping more and more work on my head. I have already stared chapter 10 of 'What Ignorance of Grown up Matters can do' and an Innocence x Exorcist fic which I have titled 'Claustrophobia'. I shall let you guess which pairing is in that one hehehe.

However I want to warn you all that updates are going to slow down even more, and I will be updating at random from now on. I'm sorry for making you wait more for my stories' next chapters.

Well, got to go now; I've got some homework to do and a nap to take before starting college again tomorrow. I think I have a German test too... Shit.

Don't forget to leave a review!

AF


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